Author Topic: Hunting joke  (Read 16255 times)

Offline upstatehunter

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #15 on: Mar 04, 11, 07:56:20 AM »

Offline ramrod

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #16 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:23:10 AM »
not really hunting but thought you motor oil drinkers would get a kick out of this!




Three leaders of the big beer companies meet for a drink.
The president of Budweiser orders a Bud.
 Miller's president orders a Millers
 and the president of Coors orders a Coors.
When it is Guinness turn to order he orders a soda.
Why didn't you order a Guinness everyone asks?
Nah Guinness replies.
 If you guys aren't having a beer neither will I.
If vegetarians love animals so much, why do they eat all their food?   

Offline Raquettedacker

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #17 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:29:03 AM »
Two hunters were walking through the woods. one of them fell down and grabbed his chest like he was in great pain. His friend had a cell phone with and called the operater. He said, I need help, i think my friend is dead. She said calm down I can help! first, make sure he is dead. The operater waited, and then heard a gun shot. He came back on the phone and said, now what?
"Dying is the easy part. Learning how to live is the hard part..."

Offline drobertsinMaryland

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #18 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:32:04 AM »
Hehe. That was so simple it was hilarious. Good one
To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift.


Offline Raquettedacker

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #19 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:32:13 AM »
One day a man went into the dentist's to get a tooth pulled. When the dentist told him he needed to give him some anesthetic he refused. The dentist told him this again and he refused saying"I have experienced the 2 worst pains in the world I don't need anesthetic". So the dentist pulled the tooth and the guy just sat there and didn't even flinch. When this was done the dentist says to the man "What were those pains ?". The guy says"the first when happened while i was out hunting, I squated down to take a poop and got my b@!!s caught in a bear trap".The dentist asks him what the second one was and the guy says "when I reached the end of the Chain"  ;D
"Dying is the easy part. Learning how to live is the hard part..."

Offline Raquettedacker

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #20 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:34:46 AM »
One day a bachlor decides that he is going to take up hunting, since he had nothing else to do with his money. He goes an buys a pick up truck and two hunting dogs. Goes to the country to hunt, when all of a sudden he spots some ducks flying over head. He takes his shot gun and shoots, he hits one and lets the dogs out. He chases after the dogs and they come to a farmers field, when the young man says " Excuse me sir, but that is my duck" The farmer says " no my land, my duck. Tell you what sonny, lets settle this the country way, We kick each other in the b@!!s, and who is left standing, gets to keep the duck. The city boy says "Allright" But the farmer says "I go first" The farmer kicks the young man in the b@!!s, and lays on the ground for about five minutes. When he finally gets to his feet, he states "OK, my turn" The farmer says "Na, you can keep the duck."
"Dying is the easy part. Learning how to live is the hard part..."

Offline Raquettedacker

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #21 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:42:52 AM »
Where did he go?? ;D

"Dying is the easy part. Learning how to live is the hard part..."

Offline loonyone

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #22 on: Mar 10, 11, 08:43:11 AM »
 ;D omg thats nuts (pun intended)

Offline bamaboy

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #23 on: Mar 11, 11, 12:13:00 PM »
Two hunters were standing up on a hill deciding on a spot to hang a stand. Suddenly, one of the hunters takes his hat off and stops talking. The other hunter sees this and then notices a funeral procession going down the highway off in the distance so he removed his hat as well. Once the last car was out of sight, he turned to he fellow hunter and said "I just want you to know that what you did was the most respectful thing I have ever seen. Even from way up here on this hill, you still took your hat off and showed your respects."  "Shucks" said the other hunter, "it was the least I could do... after all, we were married for 25 years."
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Offline drobertsinMaryland

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #24 on: Mar 11, 11, 12:15:33 PM »
To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift.


Offline loonyone

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #25 on: Mar 11, 11, 12:18:15 PM »
good one bamaboy.....lol

Offline bogmanjr

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #26 on: Mar 11, 11, 02:34:10 PM »
good one bamaboy.....lol

Priorities!!!!!!!!
" Those who forge their guns into plows will plow for those who did not " Thomas Jefferson.

Offline buckblaster

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #27 on: Mar 11, 11, 05:05:19 PM »
HAHAHA good ones.
icefishinman88 on the shanty

Offline Rebelfisher

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #28 on: Mar 11, 11, 07:20:18 PM »
these are great...keep 'em comin!
If its BROWN...Its DOWN!!!      If it FLYS...It DIES!!!

Offline upstatehunter

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Re: Hunting joke
« Reply #29 on: Mar 19, 11, 07:51:46 AM »
Two friends obtained permission to hunt a small property that held some good bucks....Both wanted to hunt the same locations and times.
They spent most of the per season and season arguing over who would go where and when....Then came the day a call came into the emergency services to send an ambulance there had been a terrible accident...There was Joe, pacing and repeating it was an accident, it was an accident....The paramedics rushed to his buddy Dave as he lay on the ground under a stand....Joe was yelling save him ,save him...Then asked the medics if they could save him as they stood looking at poor Dave....Well, we might have....but it he would have stood a lot better chance if ya hadn't gutted him.... :o