Author Topic: Questions I've asked myself  (Read 34335 times)

Offline fishnmachine

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #120 on: Jan 23, 2018, 05:43:37 PM »

             What happens when you get scared half to death twice?

Then you'd still have a quarter left.  ;D
It'll chew...

Offline The Jigger

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #121 on: Jan 23, 2018, 10:04:38 PM »
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #122 on: Jan 24, 2018, 04:33:20 AM »


      if all the world is a stage, then where does the audience sit?

Offline The Jigger

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #123 on: Jan 24, 2018, 06:35:23 PM »


Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #124 on: Jan 25, 2018, 02:20:59 AM »


      If you write a book about failure, and it doesn't sell, is it a success?   

Offline The Jigger

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #125 on: Jan 25, 2018, 01:16:04 PM »
Isn't Disney World a people trap run by a mouse?

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #126 on: Jan 26, 2018, 03:13:43 AM »


A good Irishman, John O'Reilly, met regularly with his toastmasters club. One evening they were hitting the Guinness Stout and decided to have a contest regarding who could make the best toast.

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife!" That won him the top prize for the best toast of the night. He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the best toast of the night."

She said, "Aye, what was your toast?"

John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life sitting in church beside me wife."

"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's toasting buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night with a toast about you, Mary."

She said, "Aye, and I was a bit surprised meself! You know, he's only been there twice! Once he fell asleep and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come!"

Offline ssbob

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #127 on: Jan 28, 2018, 03:14:59 PM »
Those are the smart ones rather than just walking on not knowing what is under them for ice.
     I assume you do not ice fish   safety first  check before you go  I am going fishing not swimming

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #128 on: Jan 29, 2018, 03:29:51 AM »


            Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?

Offline The Jigger

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #129 on: Jan 30, 2018, 04:31:13 PM »
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding what is it expanding into

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #130 on: Feb 01, 2018, 03:39:50 AM »


Do penguins have knees?

Offline seags

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #131 on: Feb 03, 2018, 10:12:57 AM »
What is a pacon?
Is it someone in prison?

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #132 on: Feb 04, 2018, 04:30:33 AM »


Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?

Offline seags

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #133 on: Feb 04, 2018, 08:32:16 AM »
If the NFL Super Bowl is the biggest game of the year;
 Which is the smallest NFL game of the year?

Offline 30-30

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Re: Questions I've asked myself
« Reply #134 on: Feb 05, 2018, 03:00:05 AM »
If the NFL Super Bowl is the biggest game of the year;
 Which is the smallest NFL game of the year?
               The Puppy Bowl!

 


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