Author Topic: Comic Relief!!  (Read 912926 times)

Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5835 on: Sep 11, 2021, 04:45:35 AM »


A large two-engine train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance one of the engines broke down. "No problem," the driver thought, and carried on at half power. Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill.
The driver decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."


Offline Green Mountian Hunter

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5836 on: Sep 11, 2021, 06:40:27 PM »
 :)


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5837 on: Sep 12, 2021, 04:05:51 AM »


A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions.
"Sure," GOD says, "Go right ahead".
"OK," the man says. "Why did you make women so pretty?"
GOD says, "So you would like them."
"OK," the guy says. "But how come you made them so beautiful?"
"So you would LOVE them", GOD replies.
The man ponders a moment and then asks, "But why did you make them such airheads?"
GOD says, "So they would love you!"


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5838 on: Sep 12, 2021, 04:11:25 AM »
It’s hunting season now, things are picking up, maybe comment or start a subject on that now? Look, you didn’t start this thread but you can end it. It still sucks, it’s not for fun. No one likes it and Chuck puts a happy face out of habit and feeling bad.

Look I get you both do the happy faces and beyond stupid jokes at this point to urk me but just know you both suck and no one likes you and you’re only hurting yourselves. If you guys actually contributed it might be different.

In closing everyone hates this thread. Good luck hunting, not that you guys would. SAD

          If no none likes the jokes how come there are 630,151 views? You don't have to read the jokes, just skip by them and do your thing.

Offline Green Mountian Hunter

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5839 on: Sep 12, 2021, 05:30:11 AM »
 :) :) ;)


Offline aquaassassin

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5840 on: Sep 12, 2021, 07:40:23 AM »
1. Because this thread is just one you highjacked from 2007 when it was actually a viable thread.  ( think about how many times you blink in a day? Adds up doesn’t it?)

2. Every time you post another waste of space it bumps you to the top and adds a NEW icon so that any number of millions of people googling anything about hunting see this pop up as there first option to click on when they find this site, they then leave. It’s a one time click deal trust me. There are billions of people in this world.

3. It’s all built it up of Chucks happy faces because he feel bad over the last handful of years. Not one other person has commented. How clueless can you be that these 3 reasons don’t pop into your mind out of common sense?

In closing, people come here to talk, learn, and read all things hunting. Not have this thread bump down there threads of good fortunes or questions each and every single AM. While you think it’s for fun and people enjoy it revert back to my 3 obvious reasons and realize your ignorance. Get involved, give someone a pat on the back, answer a question on here if you want to do something for fun. This surely isn’t it and I am realizing by your post you both just don’t connect the dots in everyday social life. You cannot scroll and ignore what pops up each and everyday with no sustenance and buries the posts of what we all do find fun. There were deer posted on here yesterday. Maybe tell someone congrats on the fruits of there labor. That’s what’s ( for fun )
It's not being cocky if you can back it up!

Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5841 on: Sep 13, 2021, 03:06:02 AM »


On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read...
"The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."


Offline Green Mountian Hunter

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5842 on: Sep 13, 2021, 05:44:26 AM »
 ;)p


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5843 on: Sep 21, 2021, 04:18:37 AM »


A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot.
Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff! I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didn't dance a single step!"

"So?" asked the ducks former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5844 on: Sep 22, 2021, 04:14:18 AM »


One Sunday a priest announced he was passing out minature crosses made of palm leaves. "Put this cross in the room where your family argues most," he advised. "When you look at it, the cross will remind you that God is watching."

When the parishoners were leaving church, a woman walked up to the priest, shook his hand and said, "I'll take five."


Offline Green Mountian Hunter

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5845 on: Sep 23, 2021, 07:25:18 AM »
 ;D


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5846 on: Sep 24, 2021, 05:07:04 AM »


A 57-year-old woman was arrested for shoplifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?" She replied: a can of peaches.
The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry.
The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6.
The judge then said, "I will give you 6 days in jail."
Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.
He said," What is it? "
The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."



Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5847 on: Sep 25, 2021, 03:56:00 AM »


Little Jenny walked into the kitchen one day and looked up at her mother, who was busy cooking dinner. "Mommy, how old are you?" she asked.
"Now dear," said her mother, "You should never ask a woman what her age is."
"Why not?" demanded Jenny.
"Because it isn't polite. You'll understand better when you grow up."
Jenny thought about it for a moment, then piped up, "Mommy, how much do you weigh?"
"Jenny," said her mother, "That's not a question you ask people."
"Why not?" demanded Jenny.
"Because it's not polite to ask grown-ups about how much they weigh. You'll understand some day."
"Mommy," Jenny asked, "Why did you and Daddy get divorced?"
"Darling," her mother replied with a sigh, "That's something that's still very painful for Mommy, and I really can't talk about it now. I'll explain when you are a little older."
The next day, Jenny told a friend at school about the conversation with her mother. The other little girl explained to her, "All you have to do is get a look at your mom's driver's license. It has all the information about any grown-up you want on it."
So little Jenny sneaked a peek in her mother's purse when she got home, and looked over her license, examining it carefully. That evening, she went back into the kitchen and announced, "I know how old you are, Mommy, You are 36!"
Her mother looked down at her, surprised. "And I know how much you weigh!" said Jenny. "You weigh 135 pounds." "Jenny, where did you learn this?", her mother asked. Jenny just smiled and continued, "And, I know why you and Daddy got a divorce." Her mother just gasped and asked, "Why?"
Jenny replied, "Because you got an F in sex!"



Offline Green Mountian Hunter

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5848 on: Sep 25, 2021, 04:25:28 PM »
 ;D


Offline 30-30

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Re: Comic Relief!!
« Reply #5849 on: Sep 26, 2021, 03:33:58 AM »


Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel manager’s office.
“What is the meaning of this?” the manager asked. “When you applied for the job, you told us you had 5 years’ experience. Now we discover this is the first job you’ve ever had.”

“Well,” the young man said, “in your ad you said you wanted somebody with imagination.”

 


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